Poem for a matter

"Love is so short, forgetting is so long." - Pablo Neruda 

Tonight that I shall be writing for you 
Like a girl who has long waiting for the lover 
Like a kid who has been so excited to be kissed by his mother 
Like the moon glows at night when it has completed the circular
To this day, to this night, at all kinds, I shall be writing for you. 

That it's time, that I must put this to an end 
That I shall no longer be writing for you 
Because the girl has just given up 
Because the kid has no longer wanted for the kiss kind of affection 
Because the moon has learned to be faded 
Because at all kinds, you wouldn't come to read and be mattered. 

I open my eyes and I write somehow
To you that wouldn't come, 
A simple poem to be heartened by your mindless mind
A historic of myself in neglecting the fact you'd never be mine 
Of this bitter day that full with wrongness and weeps 
Upon this night's long fatigues
I shall just be forgetting you. By now. By this point of time. 

Like we never had a hello, I shall not end this with a goodbye
This one shall then be a secret leaving. Till never, my dearest

- AY, 2.21 am


I have never thought that March of 2017, could be this meaningful and memorable-- exciting, tiring, busy but vibrant..; all at a time. It was a golden month (indeed) but fast (as well). Ever since Alevel era, movement of time now is felt too fast and every second just pass through without me realizing it, and sometimes it feels like it was just yesterday I laid my face down deeply into bed crying hard while hoping for moments to stop from torturing my heart against pain. For this time now, it is either I'm too occupied and busy or I just lay down on bed not doing anything

Back to reality, where I am currently at one of the not so well-known university (not over the sea) but just in Malaysia which my one and only country. I'm still here, (fortunately) where nasi lemak is just one step away. And parents can be hugged by just a weekend visit, not by flight but just a car or public transport. And Roti Canai at Jamek Mamak Restaurant is still the must-order menu for our cheapskate exam-week meal either for breakfast or dinner. Life has never been better, like this. 

Maybe, at this point of time, I shall be remembered that this day is actually a blessing God sent me; in form of a remedy. I feel blessed

On the other hand, apart of just sitting for exam, and studying, and getting all the assignments done; we (me and jomblos) then decided to get away with a planned short escape. You know, like just going somewhere and having picnic with smoked chicken we marinated a night before. And... we did go with the plan.. 

It was a normal weekday, when class will usually start at 10am and at most will end 3pm everyday. But on that particular day, the plan just took away my usual after-class nap because we were heading to Port Dickson for night picnic by the sea. Unexpectedly, my biggest sacrifice for my most awaiting everyday-to-do of after-class nap is indeed the best decision I ever made. For the night, was amazing! If I am allowed to throw out a cursing word to describe the amazement then yes, IT WAS FUCKING AMAZING! 

With a great food on the fire we built ourselves, and a great company, I must say it was indeed, a night to remember. We had games. you name it, just all the games people would play in fire camp; we played it. We sat in a circle under the moonlight, facing each others and just having a good laugh together. 

(yana being the most lucky girl of the night, willing to make her "dare") 

The plan was a smooth plan, but we couldn't stick so much onto it. For supposedly, we would be heading back to university for the next day 10am class. But, we intended to not going (poor sir Ricky, we really;are sorry).  We then, decided to make this short escape a longer one. So then, we headed to Melaka; the most typical historical city of my one and only beloved country. 

Before everything begins, we promised to be back to Putrajaya after this Melaka trip. I promised myself, too. 

Moving on... To melaka... 

Melaka has never been my favourite city, since kid. But this time's one, Melaka isn't just a place I call it 'favourite' but a place that would be bring me back to my jomblos once in awhile for the memories of the city I got there with them. 

Eejiban is not the best chicken rice I had, but the combination of my first time chicken rice balls with a fragrant roasted chicken they have; I must say I might want to go to Melaka just for this heavenly rice ball. Such a ball of greatness. A rice ball of memories. 

(Thanks to D, for assisting us with such precise location of Eejiban) 

Kuih Keria was before a normal kueh I had for breakfast. But Kuih Keria Antarabangsa nearby Klebang has never been a normal but extraordinary kueh I've ever had since I first came here. I don't mind standing in line for hours for such this heavenly Kuih Keria Gula Melaka. Sedap gila weh! Not to mention the most original Coconut Shake Pantai Klebang we had afterwards! What a combination, uols. 

(I doubt the international part of this kueh, nonetheless it's the best kueh keria I've ever tasted) 

Now, what is the point of a long trip without a great photo at a great spot? At my first sight, it was exactly like zaman firaun where all over my view was just sand and a few pokok (?) Pasir Berdengung is indeed, a photogenic place. Especially for hipsturrrs.. 

But then again, for just a plain jane like me, sitting at one of the tops, by just facing myself to the sun disappearing itself before the night comes, no moment is believed to be ever great as that. 

Afterwards, as planned, we were supposed to be back to Putrajaya. But then again, promises are meant to be broken. We just need 2 hours for Johor Bharu, so...... why not? 

However, we were unprepared. No more clothes, no more cash and all. So then we went to mall to get ourselves prepared. Some go for shopping, some go to withdraw some money, and some just rent the mall's toilet and make it home by having shower there. A total clumsy night! 

Dinner that night was at one stall I couldn't remember where, but I swear they offered the best asam pedas in town. I regretted myself for not ordering it. It was a very late dinner just before we start our next journey to Johor Bharu. 

I slept most of the times. The only thing I can recall during our late night journey was a highway from Melaka to Johor was a big troublesome. But the friends who drive were doing just fine. God bless. And, thank you to them for sacrificing their good sleep to drive us all the way. Without uguys, none of the places are reachable. Haha. 

After about 2 hours journey, morning was about to appear when we arrived JB. We stopped at one masjid; some rushed for better sleep inside masjid, some just waited for subuh to arrive, and some went for morning shower. 

One thing for sure, this impromptu trip was really about travelling. By travelling, I mean something more spontaneous. No such thing as good bed, or good dine-in. Nothing was prepared. Nothing was expected to happen. We went with the flow, in amidst of this togetherness. We didn't rent for accomodation. We just sleep at any stops we went for journey's break. We didn't planned what to eat, where to go; we just google around the best food and the best place google told us to go. 

In JB, most of the times, we wandered around the town without a specific destination. After some suggestions and what not, we went for lunch at this one mainstream cafe called "BigFood". (Not to forget) Before that, we went for Murtabak Cheese No. 1 and  Kacang Pool Haji. Kacang pool was for me, a weird food at first. But after sometimes, I seem to get along with the taste and i must say it is somehow unique. Surely I might go again, to have this for breakfast! BigFood (on the other hand) was for me, the best hipster cafe to go. They offer good foods with such affordable price; basically a perfect place for celebration because I swear the interior design of the cafe is soo less is more. I can say, i like it. 

(What i actually mean with good food at affordable price) 

(The best Kacang Pool Haji. Heard that it is now open at some other places as well) 

Now, every story must come to an end. Like this trip, it should be ended as well. Whatever I shall call it, an escapism, or a road trip, or even an impromptu getaway; I must say that it's not the places we go that really matter, it is the people that make this trip happen. Jomblos is the best squad I had so far. We sure would have our own life in future time, and to be back to such times like this; I doubt it. 

Memories would just be memories. Honestly speaking, this squad was those faces I've never known in college, some of them are those people I've never talked to before. If I shall call this fate, then it is. Fate brought us in one journey despite the pain we suffered from not achieving our dream; thus this togetherness shall be remained up till we achieve our dream; even up for forever in each other's mind. We were all in pain before, and now in remedy, we shall as well stay to be in this together.

Muchas gracias, to each one of you; my dearly Jomblos

"THE NIGHT IS OVER, my friend, but our story has not yet ended."
The night and darkness of this world may pass, but the light of these words shines brighter every moment.  -Rumi

Another story of home

The night has long way started but they were still in hunger; waiting in the line for that night's dinner. The baby on mother's left hand was crying; struggling for a little comfort from a little space crowded. One place at a time, one station for a typical regular crowd; must be the same group who come everytime. 

Heard from this one corner of sides, a head volunteer shouted "datang sorang harini kak?" . Must be the regular people who have come twice or more. 

All volunteers were standing readily, at every station. One person for each food station. One to get the people in line. One as "coffee or syrup, sir?" - station. Another one standing at the back while holding a big jug of syrup incase they need extra of pale but sweet in taste sirap. At the front, the helpers were asked to stand in line. Also being called 'human wall'; they were prepared to help mothers and old people. One thing about the scenery was that; they got system. No volunteer will stick at one station till the night ends; we switch among ourselves. So that everyone can experience variety of works. Everyone looks happy; that way. 

The first 5-minutes was emotional. My first station was human wall. Kinda being an observer, I got my face red holding tears. But I realized it doesn't work that way. This night was about giving, and I shouldn't take it too much at heart. I should do it happily, smiling. Just like the one who comes preparing their hands widely open; to take. 

I want to remember this night. The night when I've been taught to count little small things. The night when I see strong people living their life for another day everyday. It must be hard; but sure they are blessed in ways I've never thought by God. To me, they shouldn't be called homeless. For home is nothing like a shelter. They do have their place to sleep and live. Their home is the society around. Their home; must be the society around who care and share. So, until they are being helped by the society; they have home. Until humanity fades off, there is no way they deserve to be called 'homeless'. 

Tonight; I stopped thinking to be someone's favourite. I forgot to know the feeling of being repaid. I didn't remember how afraid I was to give because I thought I might then have less. Because-- nothing ever meaningful than someone standing at your front, looks right into your eyes and smiles-- 

then says "terima kasih banyak, dik

Ps: btw it was pertiwisoupkitchen ; may google them incase uguys are interested to join