The Companion

Living in this family, I've been told quite many times of being so lucky to actually have a complete set of brothers, sister and one younger brother. Because after all, I am in the middle and obviously I have all whatever sibling labels. Is it a blessing? Yes, until they all get married and suddenly make their own living. I can say it hurts every time I'm back from college and get to see all the rooms are empty because it's only you who are there to visit the home on that weekend. You are not going back to the full house anymore, but you're going back to take turn and eventually fill up the emptiness of the empty rooms available. Not so long before, the first thing I will look for when I'm back is my mother and secondly, entering my dibby's room. Yes, it's crucial to have him because he's the reason of what I'm going to do. He knows what to do so I can like just join in whatever he's up to. We would have a long conversation about anything and actually, he's keeping me up to date. I know what's happening around the world because he told me. I know a new song because he introduced to me. I know a new movie by just having to see a folder named 'movie 2015' so then I'll know there are all the new movies in that folder, so I can just pick any for it to be watched. Most of the times, he will wait for my coming so that we can watch together.

But it's different now. 

Totally different for most of the times I'll be homed when no one is there, I come to the empty house. No more any siblings, it just the parents and my younger brother. It hurts. No more movies time, no more long conversation. The next morning I'll wake up thinking of what I'm going to do today, which likely I'll end up do nothing. I'll just watch tv, and browse thru youtube until I get myself knackered, eventually then I'll realise it's night already and it's for sleep. The next morning is totally scripted like the day before. yeah, I'm that lonely.

Alone, that I need a companion. Someone whom I can share my bad stories while at college, I just want to have someone that can listen and tell me I'm doing okay so I don't have to worry about anything.

I have too many fears and worries as I grow up, along with that one by one from my life is making their leaving. It makes me totally a body without a soul.

Companion, how many days more for you to come? 

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